Everything said we were going to get married. She was the woman I called the love of my life. She said I was the best thing that happened to her after God. Two months into our relationship, she met my family. A month later, she introduced me to her family too....Read The Full Story Here ▶
When we had issues, we had a strong family to tap into to solve our problems. My mom loved her so even when I was right, she stayed on her side and fought against me until they won. We were indispensable, the unsinkable ship that was ready to sail across the Mediterranean Sea to a place where we’d live happily ever after.
But she found money outside our relationship and she allowed the money to change her. The guy who had the money was interested in her. He was also a half-cast, well-built and very handsome. I didn’t stand a chance when you compared me to him. I felt honoured that someone like him would go after my girlfriend but I pleaded with Jane; “He has money but remember I’ll have money too.”
I couldn’t promise her that I would be a half-cast one day or be more handsome than him one day so I couldn’t convince her. When she wasn’t with me, she was with the half-cast. When she wasn’t talking to me on the phone, she was talking to the half-cast. One day I said enough was enough. We broke up.
Two weeks later, she called. “I’m pregnant. And it’s for you. You talk a lot about that guy but we haven’t been intimate.”
I didn’t believe her so I denied responsibility. My mom was on her side. Her family were on her side so I agreed to accept only after a DNA test. She gave birth to a boy. He wasn’t a half-cast. I felt in my gut that he was mine. After DNA, it was proven beyond doubt that I was the father. I wholly accepted responsibility but swore not to have anything to do with Jane again My mom wanted me to marry her because of the baby. I disagreed with her and went ahead to find myself a new girlfriend.
One night I was inside with my girlfriend when I heard a knock on the door. It was Jane. She entered the room as if she owned my place. She sat on the sofa and placed the baby next to her. She said, “Your son wants to see you. He says he wants to spend the night with you.”
The boy was only six months old and was sleeping. My girlfriend read the signs and decided to leave. Once she was gone, Jane lifted the boy from the sofa and stepped out. She warned, “Whenever you bring her around here, we’ll also come here. You think I’m a fool? You’ll waste my life and begin afresh with someone else?”
It happened again and again. My mom was the informant. Immediately when my girl came around, she would call Jane to inform her. When it happened the third time, my girlfriend left me. She wasn’t ready for the drama and I understood her perfectly.
I didn’t bring another woman home again until I rented my own place. The only mistake I made was to take my Mom to this new place. Immediately after I settled, Jane came around with my son. He was a year old and was walking. I learned to take care of him. In the evening, she would either come for him or I would send him to her.
One day she asked when we were going to get married. I laughed out loud. “You left me for a half-cast and you think you can walk back in because we have a son? I already have a girlfriend.”
This girl swore to make my life hell. She told me until she was married and comfortable, she would not allow me to have peace with any other woman. She had the support of my mom so she thought she had everything. I dated Akos. She drove her away with drama. I dated Jennifer. She gave her hell until she also left me.
I went to her parents to complain but they didn’t do anything about it. I decided to take my son from her so I don’t get to see her again. We ended up in court. She won custody of the child. My life was miserable until one day, I packed out of my place at dawn to a new place far from them.
I sent money home. I never defaulted when it came to child support. The only thing I defaulted was seeing my son or building a relationship with him. It broke my heart but I knew one day, he would grow up and understand me better.
In the silence of my new place, I was able to build a beautiful relationship that blossomed into marriage two years later. I built it away from my mother. When I was going to do the knocking rite, I went with my uncle and our family head.
Jane got a hint of it and promised me a showdown. She said, “Do your wedding in space. That’s the only place I cannot come there.”
Before my wedding, I sent a delegate to meet her to talk to her. Her parents were involved throughout. In the end, they asked me to push her with money. They mentioned GHC20,000. We negotiated until it got to GHC18,000. I didn’t have the money but with the help of my wife-to-be, we raised GHC10,000 and promised to pay the rest a couple of months later.
During our wedding, when the pastor asked if anyone had a reason we could not be married, someone shouted from behind, “Yes! And I will say everything here today.”
We turned back and saw Jane. She was bent on disgracing me and my wife in front of the church. She called for the microphone but the church didn’t allow it. They took all of us into the mission house to discuss the matter. My wife was crying. I wrapped her in my embrace while I looked at Jane with poison in my eyes.
Because she wasn’t allowed to disgrace us, she said she wasn’t going to talk. Four men held her hand and drove her out of the compound for the wedding to continue.
We lost our glamour, reputation and serenity. A lot of wild allegations went around as the reason the wedding had to be stopped. We thought we would come back to see an empty church but it was full to the brim when we returned. They cheered us up until the wedding came to an end.
I blamed my mom. Today, I don’t talk to her the way a son and mother would. She apologized but I could only forgive but not let go.
Jane thought she had had me where it hurt but little did she know she was shooting herself in the foot. This incident happened six years ago but today no man wants to marry her. Even when a stranger comes to town and starts seeing her, they tell him the story and he backs out. She’s seen us obaa gyata, unforgiven and bitter.
Three years after marriage, I applied for custody and this time around, I was successful. She doesn’t have a job but I have a wife, a stable income and a peaceful home to bring our son. Have I forgiven her? Yes, I have but then again, I’ll never forget that day. I pray the shadow of what she did that day follows her wherever she goes.
