“My husband and I have been married for less than six months. A little after [Christmas] he started acting distant, telling me that something was bothering him but he didn’t want to tell me yet,” a woman started her confessional posted to the subreddit “r/relationship_advice.”...CONTINUE READING
The subreddit is an online forum where users seek out advice for the different kinds of relationships in their lives.
In her Reddit post, the woman, 31, wrote that she and her husband, 27, were in the process of moving and he had started a new job, so she chalked up his weird behavior to stress.
However, that wasn’t quite the issue.
After noticing that her husband had been acting distant, she decided to ask him what was wrong after he woke her up in the middle of the night crying.
When she asked, she was taken aback by her husband’s reply, “Would you consider getting Botox?”
After hearing her husband suggested she should get plastic surgery, she was “stunned, shaken [and] hurt.”
“I tried to brush it off, but it was the way in which he said it. Not jokingly or off the cuff. No, this was something that had been eating at him for weeks,” she revealed.
To her, she now assumed that any time her husband looked at her, he was judging her and thinking she was some “hideously wrinkled creature.”
While the two attempted to move on from his comment, their relationship didn’t feel the same.
“Lately he’s been crying every day, saying it makes him feel better. We’ll have a nice couple of hours and then I’ll notice his mood change.”
When he brought up the topic of her getting Botox again, he tried to make it a much lighter suggestion than before, but when she asked him what about her appearance bothered him, his response was hurtful.
“He said, and I quote, ‘It f–ks me up to see you smile or laugh,'” she recalled of her husband’s response.
After hearing that, she explained that instead of feeling angry or surprised, she just felt numb all over.
“After a moment of silence, I told him I thought we have no choice but to divorce,” she continued. “I told him that when I look at him, I see perfection. And why don’t I deserve the same?”
She acknowledged that she is “nowhere near ugly enough” to excuse her husband from waking up nightly in tears because her appearance bothers him that much.
“How am I ever supposed to feel attractive again? I now look in the mirror and can’t unsee what he sees,” she questioned.
She pointed out that she wants to age naturally and has no plans to get Botox done to please her significant other.
“I love to smile and laugh, and I’ve been told my smile is one of my best attributes. But evidently, my happiness is causing my husband pain. How do we rebuild what’s broken?”
“I would never be able to look at my husband and smile again if he said that. And if you get botox for him, he’ll feel comfortable asking you for the next thing,” one user wrote.
Another user added, “He seems manipulative and to have self-confidence and self-image issues.”
“It’s perfectly within your right to be questioning where you guys stand because that’s a huge violation of your trust.”
A third user chimed in, “The only thing you should be doing is taking care of your skin by removing the added stress, that will age your skin more, of being around that awful individual.”
“I hope you can feel more comfortable in your beautiful skin with another beautiful individual that loves you for who you are.”
