Some parents may have toxic behaviors or words towards their children, as reported by the psychological expertise site Hack Spirit. These words are imprinted in their minds in a lasting way and can cause long-term damage. These depreciative and harsh words can inscribe children in logic that can lead them to maintain low self-esteem. This dynamic stems from the behaviours that hinder the development of the child throughout his or her life. Here are seven sentences that can negatively impact a child....CONTINUE READING THE ARTICLE FROM THE SOURCE
1. “You’re fat/weather/moche.”
Comments on the physicality of family members, and even more so about children, can have serious consequences for their self-image. By invalidating or validating a certain type of appearance, the parents induce a model in the child to refer to. The continuation of this standard can then be established, in particular through their eating behaviour.
Avoid depreciating the child
2. “You’re worthless.”
When a child is devalued, he or she feels that he or she is moving in a secure climate. He doesn’t feel in his place and feels that he has to be something other than what he is. The danger is that he will develop insecurities in the various relationships he has in the family home but also outside the family home. On the other hand, the pursuit of an ideal is a futile quest in which the child may well be exhausted for many years.
3. 3. “You’re stupid.”
Telling his child that he’s stupid is insulting. It hurts him and makes him feel not enough. He may develop the impression of not deserved the love of his parents and other people around him. On the other hand, he may develop a lack of self-confidence that does not allow him to take on challenges throughout his life. He is likely to miss a professional career that is certain that he will not succeed.
Avoid making the child responsible for your feelings
4. “I never wanted you.”
If parents were surprised by the arrival of their child, or if the challenges of parenthood require a lot of adaptation, it is not the child’s fault. Making it a faulty of the challenges and changes it represents in the life of the household can create real consequences for his mental health.
5. “If you loved me, you…”
This sentence makes the child responsible for the well-being of his or her parents. He may in the future bury his emotions so as not to disturb his parents and feel like he is winning their love. Burying his emotions does not allow the child to learn how to regulate them. Even as an adult, he may be charged.
Avoid making her feel your disappointment
6. “Why can’t you look more like…?”
Comparison is a relational dynamic that may suggest to the child that he is not sufficient and therefore not loved as he really is. Its self-esteem is likely to be weakened in a sustainable way.
7. “You’re a disappointment.”
Here again, parents make it clear to their child that he is not the one they would have liked to have. This induces a child to an apron of his or her personality and behaviour in order to gain the love of his or her parents. A toxic dynamic that may create emotional worries in children for years.
